Taking a trip down Father’s Lane on Father’s Day 2025. I lost my father in 2017 and I became a father in 2002. Turning back the hands of time. How is a father viewed through his kid’s eyes? How do I view my kids as a father?
Who are Fathers? According to the bible fathers should be: Spiritual Leaders, A Loving Husband, Encourager, Role Model, Dreamer, Mentor, and a Provider.
Looking back at my father and the stages I experienced growing up.
As a toddler I do not have many memories of anything. I see lots of pictures and once you get to know your dad you can image the picture playing out. We were loved, taken care of, spoiled (to us), always looking for adventure, and learning from our dad.
As I became school age and started elementary school you start to have certain memories stick out. I was a kid that did not like to sit still. I always wanted to be on the go. This was good but not great for school. I remember in Second grade always getting talked to. (In trouble is another way to put it.) I remember sitting at the dinner table. My dad not happy with me bringing notes home from my teacher daily. Said if you get one more note sent home, I will start going to school with you and sitting in your classroom with you. That was enough for me to start behaving in 2 nd grade!
Going through early years before teen years us kids were oblivious to adult problems. We knew my dad had a job and worked every day. That was about it. We never heard my parents fight or argue. We never heard about struggles or money problems. We took family vacations and camped in the summers. We thought we had a normal life growing up. Later as adults you find out more about some of the struggles my parents had with jobs and finances. This was never anything we even thought about growing up. I was unaware of money of cost of items.
In high school for me I was more consumed with my friends and myself. We still had family times where we did things together. We would go out to dinner, movies, and visit family. High school years were more of me being out on my own. Getting my license and driving. Always on the go with friends doing things so never really wanting to be home or sitting around.
After High School still probably in the all about me phase. I would say 16 to early 20’s at least I was more into me. What was best for me. I was not worrying about spending time with my parents. In my mid to late 20’s I found myself enjoying spending more time with my dad. We could go have a beer, go to casino, talk work, talk about ideas, have a cup of coffee, and just enjoy spending time together. We took several trips just us two or friends of mine with my dad. I would say at this stage my dad became one of
my closest supporters, advice person, and friend.
For me becoming a dad for the first time. I had no idea what to expect or how I would be as a parent. I only had my experience growing up to go off of. Being a dad for the first time and parenting you learn as you go and draw on your own childhood experiences. You realize more why your parents did certain things you never understood when you are a child. You feel a love for your kids that is truly just pure true love. You want your kids to feel loved, be loved, have a great childhood, and don’t want them to be sick or get hurt. You worry at times. You are scared at times. You just do the best you can do and sometimes hope your best is good enough to raise good humans.
Being a dad and raising kids is the hardest job because you want so much to be perfect and them to have a perfect childhood and memories. I realized how great my childhood was and all that my parents did for me after having kids of my own. Growing up I did not think that camping, going on vacations, Cedar Point, Sea World, and every other trip we did was amazing. My parents did these for us to make memories to look back on. All the traditions around holidays. Making cookies, going to church, Easter baskets, and having great Christmas mornings with lots of new toys to play with. Looking back as an adult I think it was more than amazing all we were blessed to do growing up.
When my dad became sick it was one of the hardest times in my life. I have always been a lot like my dad and our conversations were special. To see my dad sick and passing away was difficult time. You never think it will happen when it happens. You always think you have more time. We all take time for granted because things change, and you are suddenly out of time. There is no going back or doing things over. I often wish I would have spent more time with my dad. I wish I would have asked him more
questions and about his memories. I hope my kids and me one day we have some conversations talking
about life and memories. Good stories.
I cherish my relationship I had with my dad. I hope all my boys look back when they get older as I have done and are super thankful and appreciative of all we try to do for them as they have grown up. Jenette and I try to make memories and do as much as we can for the boys. Same as when I was a teenager, I am sure they are not in amazement now, but one day they will look back and see how much love we tried to pour into their lives. Giving them opportunities and making memories.
Family moments are created with love and laughter. Spending time together is always fun. This Father’s Day we were all together. The day ended playing running bases. Simple yet 10 years from now if we say remember playing running bases, they all will remember us playing running bases.
I pray I get to see all the boys get older and become adults. I hope one day they all have the same relationship with me as I did with my dad. Being a dad is hard and you worry about how you are doing raising your kids. I had the very best example and I hope I can give my boys a great example and as many memories I was had with my dad. Happy Father’s Day 2025!
